3...2...1...CHEERS!

Out with the old and in with the new...New Years Eve. That time of year when most people pledge to lose those extra pounds, stop a nasty habit, or start a good habit.

We've all seen the movies where there are lavish parties...beautiful dresses, lots of champagne, and of course the famous midnight kiss! I will not have such a lavish evening. I enjoy the quiet of staying at home and spending time with hubby and the girls. I had always dreamed of going to that glamorous party... but when Chris left 2 years ago for a month long business trip to China on New Years Eve, well, my thoughts changed. Friends and family invited me to go out or come over, but I declined. Bella, then 4, and Charlotte, almost one, and I just stayed home. We played games, ate whatever, and watched movies...I loved it! There was no pressure of what to wear or what to bring-who I would kiss at midnight was a no-brainer :)

This year I will stay home, too...Bella is sick. However, I'm sure there will be a movie to watch and a game or two to play. I'll be making lobster and prawns for dinner and dessert...well that's for after the kids are sleeping!

Happy New Years! And CHEERS for what this next year may bring!

Merry Christmas...

Bella & Cricket at The Wilderness Lodge at Walt Disney World

...from our house to yours. May you have a blessed holiday season with your friends and family.

A Full Year...

I can't believe I made it a full year...Yesterday and today I have done everything in my power to keep busy. Running after kids, 6 loads of laundry, cleaning, changing bed sheets, cooking, and baking. Frankly, now I can't stop baking! Well first I made cran-orange muffins, peppermint bark, peanut butter blossom cookies, and I'm on to jam thumbprints...Jane, I'll be over later because we can't possibly eat all these goodies.

Am I done grieving...no, but another year is starting and I survived these last two days of reliving memories. Back to baking...

Happy Birthday, Ava...

Know that we love you and wish you were here with us...Happy Birthday sweet angel...Love, Mommy

Hi Ho...Off To Disney We Go!

It's finally here!!! After 2 years of planning and saving we're off to Walt Disney World for 10 days of wonderful!

So, I will see you all when I return and I'm sure I will have oodles of stories and pictures to share. My posting my even be able to keep up with yours, U.Lee *wink*

*Cheers- to warm weather, celebrating anniversaries, and family fun with Mickey & the Gang!!*

What Does Dirt Taste Like?

Well it's another holiday season and it's time to bake cookies! And that means it's time for a cookie exchange...or so I thought. Yesterday, my friend Jane came by to bake cookies with me. I had come across this wonderful cookie magazine at Costco and we decided to try out some new recipes!

Jane wanted something chocolaty and we found "chocolate walnut cookies". Yummy yummy! I started my cookie dough for chocolate-hazelnut cookies. The dough had to chill after you rolled it out...then you cut out shapes-I picked hearts. So when we got back from my nephews 1st birthday party I was ready to finish my cookies.

Well the dough cracked when I tried to cut them out...let the dough warm up and re roll...bake for 8 minutes...let cool...drizzle with white peppermint chocolate...taste test before packaging...half for Chris to taste & the other half for me...YUCK! Chris has informed me this was the worst tasting thing he has ever eaten-he's eaten alot of interesting things...especially traveling overseas. "It was even worse than cow stomach & noodles!"

I personally think the dirt I ate as a kid tasted better!
Time to look for a new recipe...and maybe not from my cookie mag I thought was so fab =)


Give Jane a cookie and some dishes & she's quiet as a mouse!

















Chocolate Walnut Cookies

4 1/2 oz (1 cup) all-purpose flour
1/2 cup natural or Dutch-processed cocoa
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
3 oz (6 Tbs) unsalted butter at room temperature
1 oz (2 Tbs) vegetable shortening
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 large egg
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
3/4 cup chopped walnuts

Position racks in the upper and lower thirds of the oven and heat oven to 350 degrees. Line 2 baking sheets with parchment or foil. In a medium bowl, combine the flour, cocoa, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. Mix thoroughly with a wire whisk. set aside.
In a stand mixer fitted with a paddle attachment beat the butter and shortening on medium speed until creamy. Add both sugars, beating until well combined. Beat in the eggs and vanilla. Turn the mixer to low speed and mix in the flour mixture just until incorporated. mix in the nuts.
Drop heaping teaspoonfuls of batter about 1 1/2 inches apart on the prepared baking sheets. Bake for about 10-12 minutes (after 5 minutes, switch the pans from top to bottom and rotate them from back to front for even baking). The cookies will puff up and then settle down slightly when done. Let cool on the baking sheets on a rack for a few minutes. With a metal spatula, transfer the cookies to a rack to cool completely.

P.S. Gobble Take 2

Forgot to share these photos...Cricket and my Mom were making pie crusts, while Bella and I were making the pumpkin filling!

Gobble All The Way...

Another great meal...I love Thanksgiving! I have to say that this year went very smooth-my other half couldn't believe that I wasn't freaking out and running around like a chicken with my head cut off! I was as cool as a cucumber! What was Chris thankful for this year...I wasn't yelling at him and no bowls were hurled in his direction! *have I mentioned I'm Irish and Serbian...we're known for our tempers and love of fighting :) *
I decided to have dinner instead of my usual lunch. It was nice not to have to get up at 5am to prep the bird and have it in the oven by 7am...Bella and Cricket didn't get that memo & I was up early, but had time to make a nice breakfast of a praline topped french toast casserole-Yum!
My in-laws got the wrong memo and arrived a few hours early, but m-in-law made appetizers so we leisurely grazed and gabbed, while the boys watched football and the kids played.
Here's our day! Hope yours was as wonderful as mine...


Pilgrim Bella Playing Bingo!

Bella & Cricket making God's Eyes with Gigi

Grandpa's pre-turkey nap

My 26 lb. bird!
Making a memory book with Auntie

Hubby's side of the family...
minus Dad

Thanksgiving Everyday

So the other night Chris and I were chatting...our recent chats have been about Thanksgiving. I can't believe it's almost here already! Anyway, this has become my holiday...so of course there's who's coming and who's not, what football games are playing and when, how big the bird should be, should I make a ham as well or put another bird on the grill? There's all these things to do-on and on the lists grow.

This is #2 on my favorite holiday list. But realistically, there is much more than eating a fabulous meal to this holiday. For the Jews, their thanksgiving holiday lasts 3 days...The pilgrims who survived hardship and had next to nothing celebrated for 7 days! Why do we, who have so much to be thankful for, only celebrate once? Shouldn't we celebrate Thanksgiving 365 days a year?

So that is my goal this year, be thankful for something everyday, no matter how small! In this country where there is SO MUCH I think we lose perspective of things. Life should really be about the little things- whispered "I love you's, "I'll help you's" from your eager children with outstretched hands, "I just called to see how you're doing?" from your friends...the list could go on and on.

May everyone be richly blessed this year and have a Very Happy & Truly Thankful Thanksgiving!!!

An Extra Stocking...

I normally don't put up my Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving, but this year is an exception. We'll be leaving early December for 10 days to take the kids to Disney!!!! I'm as excited as the kids =)

Yesterday, Chris helped me drag out the boxes from under the stairs. I decided to tone it down this year. Only one tree for the kids to decorate how they choose instead of the normal 4! They made construction paper chains and stain glass window cookies...the tree looks adorable and perfectly simple.

Today I was looking in the boxes for my garland and found our stockings....one, two, three, four, and one for Ava...oh how my heart aches. And so that stocking goes back in the box and tears are wiped away...it seems like yesterday, yet on the 19th of December it will be a year...So even though it is a crazy time of year and filled with joy-you are in my thoughts while I pack for Disney, decorate the tree with your sisters, and get ready for all those Thanksgiving and Christmas events. And I know you are watching quietly from Heaven... my sweet baby angel.

Quantum of Solace

Another Way To Die Jack White & Alicia Keys

Another great Bond movie as far as I'm concerned. Daniel Craig, well what can I say...definitely sexy and serious eye candy! I fell in love with the opening credits and this song...

Wicked Tuesday!

I must admit that The Wizard of Oz is hardly one of my favorite movies. In fact I would put it in my top 5 least favorites-I know, I can hear the "boos" already...It's almost sacrilegious to admit that, but yes I just did. And then I will tell you that Wicked is fabulous!

My GF Jane and her 2 munchkins, along with Bella and I hit the road and headed downtown! We ate at this tasty mexicana restaurant first-I must make 2 comments here...1. so Jane goes to restroom numerous times...then she tells me I NEED to go! I go in-it's a nice bathroom for a small space, but what I really notice is the art they have chosen. At first I notice that's it's a painting of a tree, then the double take...this tree is very anatomically correct as it was half woman! Very voluptuous!
2. Since when did men start wearing rosaries for necklaces? Maybe I need to get out of the "burbs" more often?!?

Our next stop...Macy's to check out the holiday windows. A man definitely designed these! In fact I would go as far to say a engineering drop out designed them. I was hoping they would be better, but I wasn't that impressed except for a few funny words they came up with... "phenominizer" *hee hee* I thought of you Chris!

And finally...we're at the Oriental Theatre! Oh! The theatre is Beautiful!!! I would have loved to take photos, but they don't allow you to. The carvings on the walls and on the ceiling were so ornate and detailed-gilt gold, carved shells, stars, and faces...magnificent!

On with the show...If you haven't seen it-GO! Great scenery, acting and singing-witty, too!

So thank you for asking me to along, Jane! My only disappointment with this adventure...no midnight dinner in Chinatown! There's always next time...

Don't Let Me Fall

Don't Let Me Fall By Lenka

A sweet tune that helps get you out of your funk...Lord knows I'd rather play something moody, but I'm going to fight that urge. So, I am pulling up the boot straps and enjoying today! That's my goal- let's see how it goes...

A Wink and A Smile...

The song Chris and I chose for our first dance together as husband and wife. I can still say that my wedding was one of the best I've been to in my life-and it should be that way. I can still remember how beautiful the weather was that day...the sun shining bright and all the fall colors. Then at the end of the night, big fluffy snow flakes-my prayers had been answered. Not just for great weather and snow all in one day, but for the love of my life.

I married my best friend 10 years ago and we're still best friends today. Chris is more than I could have ever dreamed of. He is still my best friend...I love that no matter what we're doing it's fun! He helps me see past the gook, is there when I need someone to pick me up, and just lets me be me. I admire his integrity and his outlook on life. I love that he's the peacemaker, is willing to learn new things, and can do all those projects around the house!

Although I give him a hard time about being more and more like his Grandad, he is becoming more and more like his Grandma Selma. She was one of the most wonderful women I will ever know. She accepted people for who they were-no matter what. She loved unconditionally and had such a zest for life. I think Chris has always had these traits, but I can see them more clearly now that I'm older.

He is a fantastic father to Isabella and Charlotte-sometimes I wonder if he wouldn't be better suited to staying home with them. He doesn't mind the messes they make doing a project, his patience is what I pray for every day, but somehow never get, he is a constant teacher, and the "big kid" ready to play at a moments notice.

I am truly blessed to have him in my life and I pray we will have many more years together.

So thank you, Chris for being you and for choosing me to spend your life with. I love you more than these pitiful words can say. For you are the one with the eloquent words that I love so dearly. I know that this last year has been rough-thanks for sticking by me & not letting go...I LOVE YOU!

HAPPY 10th ANNIVERSARY

Cure For Pain

"Cure For Pain" By Jon Foreman, Fall album

I started this blog to help myself deal with my inner pain. For me music is something that I can't live without. Ask my husband-I'm addicted. I also believe music heals. So I've decided to have a song of the week. What it might be I have no idea...Chris says my taste in music is so extreme and diverse he never knows what might end up on his ipod, but it's always interesting!

I hope you'll enjoy some of my picks...

Do Reindeer Really Fly???

According to the Hardy family in Rantoul, IL-Yes they do! In an airplane from Alaska, of course...The Hardy's own a reindeer ranch in Rantoul, Il near where my parents have a lake house.

We went to visit last Saturday and had a wonderful time! There was a gift shop, play area, hay rides, cart races, corn maze, and reindeer tours. We hung out with Santa's helpers most of the time. The girls got to pet these beautiful creatures and feed them reindeer cookies "graham crackers"-hee hee! What a fabulous experience!

Halloween Fun!

What a beautiful day to trick or treat! The last few years I have given up and headed home with, a then baby, Charlotte due to the extreme cold. Not this year! It was a perfect 75 and this year the girls gave up because they were tired!


Here are pics of "Rag Doll Bella" and "Tiger and Bedtime Bear Charlotte"

Isabella Turns 6!!!

I can hardly believe that my firstborn is 6! It seems like just yesterday I was at the hospital being induced and a mere 30 hours later she was born. Isabella Rose...I had wanted her to be an Avery, but I lost the battle with Chris. I must admit though, she is an Isabella...the moment I saw her for the first time she was a Bella. It is a true miracle that you can look at that little face and fall instantly in love.





Now she is a beautiful girl of six...We had two parties for her this weekend. One for friends and one for family. Friends came over on Saturday afternoon to play games (sak races, bean bags, pinata, and unwrap candy with socks on your hands**hee hee**) I love Bella's friends and thankfully I'm just as fond of the parents as well!!!

I have wonderful girlfriends who have seen me at my worst ( and still tolerate me!) and have gotten me through some of the hardest times in my life. So girlies-thank you for everything...words can never adequately express how grateful I am that you're in my life. "Love you!" **Smooches**

You gotta love girlfriends who tell you, "you don't need to mow your grass", " Just close that door", and "I'll make those wings for you" (then brings homemade spring rolls too!)...

Bella had so much fun opening her gifts, smooching a particular boy who has declared they're "an item", blowing out the candle on her cupcake, and playing with her friends. While the kids were playing downstairs the girlies had a chance to catch up and gab a bit! What is our favored topic of conversation these days??? Why, laundry of course!!! But this I'll save for another blog...what can I say !?!

Happy Birthday Bella!

You are a true joy in my life...I shall always admire your zest for life. You're definitely a half full glass girl! You love unconditionally and I'm always amazed by the wisdom you possess for someone so young. So may you be always blessed in life, know how much your mother loves you and how proud she is of you!

Scissors and Milk

"Cricket? What are you doing?"

It was way too quiet upstairs...I had been downstairs swapping out a new load of laundry.
I noticed she is trying to quickly put something back on the little table in the dining room.

"What did you have?"
"Scissors!"
"Where did you get scissors?" I was searching for blood and what she might have been cutting.
"I use scissors-Bella's dress..."

Lord have mercy...there was the victim. Bella's favorite blue princess dress up dress. Once sweet and lovely, now it has a slashed punk rock feel. I must admit her cutting skills were much better than I thought...Thank God she didn't cut herself, the curtains, the dog...Well hopefully Bella won't want to play dress up today.

Fast forward a few hours...
"Mom, where's my dress up dress?"
Murphy's law...

After dinner, Chris usually hangs out with the girls before bed. Tonight he wanted to show them a few new games he downloaded onto his iphone. Bella played first, then Charlotte.

"Mom-Dad, Charlotte did something VERY naughty!"

We ran into the dining room to find Chris' iphone covered in milk...I think my heart stopped for a moment...Charlotte had been playing this game called iNeko. The point or lack there of in this game is to touch different areas of the screen to get the kitty to run around after your finger. The kitty can get smaller or larger, take a nap, meow, scratch, and of course chase its tail. The girls love this crazy kitty!

After Chris cleaned up the mess and made sure his phone worked, he laughed.
"It's funny when you think about it. She was just giving the cat some milk!"

It's really over...

Yes folks, it's truly over...Summer that is. It always goes by way too fast. I never get all my outside projects done and I never get to the lake houses enough.

Today I know for sure it's really over. Why??? Two reasons, well actually three.

1. We woke up to a very chilly house-63 degrees F. No wonder I could hardly get myself going this morning. Although my children were thrilled to find eggs, sausage, and chocolate chip pancakes on the table for breakfast! It just doesn't get much better than that for them =)

My husband on the other hand grumbles and mutters to himself about why he just can't eat his Kashi cereal...any other man would be thrilled to eat such a lavish breakfast, nope not Chris!

2. Today was fall bulb planting day! Yipee-I was so excited to buy my bulbs at Costco. Thank goodness my girlfriend pulled me back into reality and only let me buy 200 bulbs. How long could it possibly take? Lord have mercy-FOREVER! I didn't ever get finished...only 60 more tulip bulbs to go. I must admit that having two small children creates many distractions. Especially when I'm potty training my youngest. Every five minutes I'm running into the house to help her. My hubby finally had the good sense to put the little potty into the garage-why didn't I think of that? Back to the tulips...hopefully this week we'll still have good weather to plant the rest. At the rate I am currently going, I'm guessing it'll take me at least another ten years to get all my bulb planting done!

3. THE CREAMERY!!! This is a summertime tradition-a must do-a sinful addiction...Cricket, my youngest, awoke from her nap around 5. As she peered out her window she noticed that her sister was sitting in my hubby's new car. Tears and an enormous pout formed on her face-she loves daddy's new car. She wanted a ride too! I so wish I had my camera handy to take a shot of such a pathetic face. Well, I buzzed inside to help her with her shoes so daddy could take her for a spin around the block, with her sissy too. I was going to try to figure out what to do about dinner and get cleaned up from planting, when Chris opens the door to tell me we're going to The Creamery. Ice cream for dinner!!! What's not to love about that...So off we go to get our treat. Bella gets a small rainbow cone, which is enormous! A baby vanilla cone for Cricket, a twist with dip for me, and a twist with a dip and a crunch for hubby. Chris suggests we eat outside-may I just comment that it's only 55 degrees outside-he doesn't want ice cream drips and sticky fingers in his car. After a few minutes, Bella is ready to dessert her ice cream for warmer surroundings and at my coaxing Chris finally gives in. Warmth at last! Normally The Creamery is only open til Labor Day, but since the kids are still playing baseball they have stayed open later this year. As we're driving home-Bella's cone is now upside down in a dish-she is marveling at all the different flavors.

"Ooohhh, there's nuts in the green" (Pistachio) "I just found a strawberry...ummmm or is it a cherry??? "I really like the chocolate and orange sherbet!"

"How come you only get a dip Kat? You know the crunch is where's it's at!!! How else can you get more sugar and a good crunch on a cone?" My husband will never understand why I can't just get my cone dipped AND with a crunch...he's so funny about it!

Then of course Cricket pipes in, "Bella- no one hand, no one hand! Ohhh gosh..." Bella isn't holding her ice cream cup with two hands...It's never dull with this bunch!

Well, we all got home without creating a sticky mess! But thank goodness we made our last final run to our favorite ice cream place.

It's going to be 44 degrees tonight, time to turn on the heat...it's really over!

Rubber Bands & Horsey Tails???

My daughter, Isabella, has been blessed with beautiful long curly blonde hair. Her sister, Cricket, is 2 1/2 and has not been so lucky in the hair department-well at least not in the length.

Ever since Cricket could hold the big girl brush she would try to brush her barely there locks. She would make very long sweeping motions as if she were Rapunzel in her tower. In her mind her hair is down to her butt, long and flowing. Unlike her very real cropped short curls.

I was pulling Bella's hair back with colored rubber bands, this morning, when we both noticed a pair of tiny hands grabbing at the rubber band package. The Cricket monster was here! Bella and I were trying to get her out of the bathroom-due to lack of space and my visions of a gazillion tiny rubber bands all over the floor!

"Horsey tails! Horsey tails!"
"What is Cricket talking about?" Bella asked.
"Horsey tails, Bella! Me too!"

Then it dawned on me...Cricket wanted pony tails just like her sissy!

Did we have a good laugh! In the words of Cricket, "I so funny!"

Ava

"Why do you want to blog?" my husband asked me last night. I didn't really have an answer for him. Why? That's the question that kept running thru my head last night as I lay in bed...I was talking to my girlfriend this morning and informed her it was to help keep my life more positive. Partly true. Ava is the real reason.

There are days when I can hardly breathe...days when the heartache is so bad I have no idea how to cope. Before Christmas last year I was admitted to the hospital to deliver my 18 week old baby who had died from a fluky umbilical cord accident. This was my fourth miscarriage and by far the hardest to deal with.

My oldest daughter, Isabella, gave me daisies when I came home from the hospital. I now have daisies planted in all my flower beds to remind me of Ava and to remind me how precious life is.

So, this is me...a wife, a mother to 2 beautiful girls, and a woman trying to finish healing.

Here's to healing, a new chapter in my life, and becoming the woman I want to be...

The best part of the day!

Bedtime! It evokes either utter frustration or pure bliss...On ML Drive it's both! This is the time in the day when you've had it and are longing to crawl into bed yourself...if you're like me however, you still have to do dishes, there's a couch full of clean laundry waiting to be folded, at least 3 more loads to still get into the washer, lunches to be made for the next day, and I could go on forever...Somewhere in here it might be nice to catch up with hubby and of course the dog needs to be dealt with...Harry, who we had to keep because our eldest fell in love with him. We had an offer to get him off our hands so a friends beagle wouldn't be lonely, but what we do for those sweet faces who beg to keep their furry friends near and dear-ugh...Anyway, enough of the dog...on to the the last 1/2 mile of the marathon...
"Did you get your washcloth and towel?"
"No...Is Daddy giving us a bath?"
"Yes, get in the tub..." I am trying to get something accomplished...I must admit I adore hearing the girls squeal with delight and singing crazy made up songs with my husband.
"Kat?? Charlotte's done..."
My youngest comes out of the bathroom yelling, "NAKED BABY!"
It's my job to dry them off, lotion them up, and get them into jammies. One munchkin down and one to go... Bella's next...she is notorious for naked booty dances...
On to getting teeth brushed, stories read, prayers said, and...."wait I have to go potty...." & "sippy peas wif ice"
"Cricket, do you have Woof and your purple murple?"
"Bella, do you have your big bunny and greenie zucchini?"
Then, the best part of the day..."I love you's" are said, hugs and kisses are given, and don't forget the Do do dos! These are eskimo kisses (rubbing noses) and saying the words, "Do, do, do." What your kids come up with! Sometimes this must be done multiple times and you think they will never go to bed, but I wouldn't trade these night-night traditions for the world!